alot things had been happen lately...
there is lost and there is gain...sometimes i dont even know whether it is really a good things
or just sumhow situations are just toying with me..

ppl that is dearest to me ...who that is soo close that i could talk and show my whole heart to care had become a rather strangers to me...
well..i guess thats life right...nothing could ever be the way that you exactly wanted it..
there is alot ppl who actually gave up alot things...nomatter efforts, money or our own heart
but most of the times...we get nothing out of it.
but for those who would get the repayed by what they actually gaved out..is indeed really blessed and i really hope that they would be grateful for it..no matter how small the outcome that they receive...

im letting go alot of things know...im just too tired to keep bearing the burden on top of my own shoulder...
keeping to care soo much bout how they would think bout me...
staying in church for too long ...had somehow had forgotten how human basic nature would act...
i was once really familiar with it..b4 i was actually a christian...
well i guess thats humans weaknesses that everyone has...for being stupid or blinded by lies ,there is noone that u could actually blame rather than ur ownself trusting it.

there is noone that really rely rather than God and ownself, i got a homework to do now.
a really simple task but yet really hard for me to do it..and im sure alot ppl out there is having the same difficulty like me.
and that is relying on god in everyway that i could,i was once a boy who would took all the problem unto myself...wont tell anybody bout it, but once that i had someone i could talk with..well i guess not anymore.
there just me and god now,for he had already taken back from me soo that i could realise that this all just human desire..nothing true come out of it.
From nothing into something,and from something into nothing back.
Still im still really grateful for everything that i had now or in the past, for everything that he said or done,he did it because he loves u.